not over it

I thought I was doing well living a “normal life”, watching my health doing light exercises. Well apparently, I am not. Why? Well a few months ago, I had to go to the hospital. I was having severe chest pains. At first when I felt this sharp pain I ignored it. I had ignored it because I thought “oh it’s nothing”. ( I know what you’re thinking….stupid why are you ignoring chest pains??) I had ignored this pain for a couple of hours. It was our anniversary, DC and I decided to go out for supper.

While we were at supper I continued to have these sharp pains, it felt like it was shooting directly to the heart. DC saw me jump one time when I had really bad one and asked me if I had the hiccups. I replied no, and said I’ve had these sharp pains in the chest. DC asked me if we should go to the hospital, and I of course said no I’m fine. But DC knew better and said he was taking me to the hospital.

When we finished our supper, I know again…stupid waiting until we finished our supper but I didn’t want to go. I was so nervous. I was being stubborn. When we arrived to the Emergency, the nurse asked what was my reason for coming in. I told her that I had chest pains. She looked at me with a puzzled face, like “really?” I told her that I have a history of heart problems and an ICD. The nurse asked me questions about my symptoms and said to go straight thru the emergency so I could be looked at right away.

We went in and the emergency nurse immediately put me in a room told me to undress so she could put the heart monitor on me. Then she immediately put an IV in, this all happened within 10 mins. I couldn’t believe how quickly they were attending to me. They told me they take any chest pain very seriously and do not take any chances. Well this made me worry, I started to panic and I started to cry because I didn’t want something to happen again. Made me think about when I first collapsed and when I was shocked. All the emotions of that made me cry and I realized I wasn’t over it. I wasn’t over the trauma.

The doctor came in and did an assessment, checked my heart, ordered a blood test to make sure I didn’t have a blood clot forming, sent me for an ECG. Nothing showed any signs of a heart attack or stroke, the next thing the doctor suggested that it might be my lead from the ICD. He said that it might be possible the lead moved and is giving me little electrical shocks.

I started to panic, I looked at DC and just burst in to tears. I did not want to hear that! The doctor said I needed a CT scan done to see if the lead moved but couldn’t do it until the morning when the tech would come in. DC and I went home for a few hours to sleep, which I didn’t get much of. I just of course worried. Finally morning came and we went back to the hospital for the scan.

After a few hours at the hospital I had a cardiologist come look at the scan results and told me that the ICD did not move! I was so relieved!! But we still didn’t know why I was getting sharp chest pains until after one of the nurses said she had similar pains but it was because she was exercising too hard. Well! It was like a doorbell went ding! In my brain and I knew! I knew why I was getting the pain! I was helping DC put boards down for our deck. I remembered, I was holding the board too long and I said to DC to hurry because it was making my arm sore.

The doctor had given me some medication to help with the pain but said if it still persisted I was to come back. After we left the hospital, I couldn’t believe by holding one board would hurt me that much and made me realize, I am still not over it and it will be one day at a time……….

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lucky

I know I haven’t written in a long while. I haven’t been in the mood to write.

Today, January 24th…….is my lucky day. I can’t believe it’s been 2 years! It’s amazing how time goes by so quickly and yet it feels like it was yesterday. I have been quite emotional this past week coming up to my anniversary. I think I always will not because it’s sad, but because I am so grateful.

It’s not a day that goes by I don’t think about the day of my collapse (in a good way). I think about how lucky I was at the right place, the right time and how lucky it was to have the lifeguards doing their first aid meeting. The lifeguards will always be apart of my life for what they did for me. Gave me life. Again.

Lots have happened in the past 2 years, I got to drive again, ran a 5k and walked another, watched our daughter D graduate, moved to another province, was apart from DC for 9 months because we couldn’t sell our house, sold our house, got clearance to go back to work again, travelled, and to become grandparents.

I can look forward to the many years ahead, to watch my children grow and have their own families. I have learned life is short and to not take it for granted.

I am lucky!


goodbye 2012 hello 2013

Goodbye 2012!

Finally it is over! I am so glad to see it end!

What a year it has been for my family and I.

It’s been a hard year. A year with ups and downs.

2012……… the year they said the world was going to end.

2012……… the year with the date 12/12/12

2012……… the year I learned more life lessons

2012……… the year I am thankful

2012……….the year I lost my father

2012……….the year I grew stronger

I read this quote on Pinterest

“and once the storm is over you won’t remember how you made it through, how you managed to survive. You won’t even be sure, in fact, whether the storm is really over. But one thing is certain. When you come out of the storm you won’t be the same person who walked in.”

I love this quote because I feel that’s exactly how this past year has been for me. 2012 was hard, but the thing I learned the most this past year is that life is short. We need to remember to tell that special person(s) you love them, even if they say they know you do, even if you think it’s silly, or haven’t said it, or you don’t think it’s important, because if you suddenly do happen to leave this earth without saying it, the person (s) you left behind will always wonder……

Hello 2013!

They say the number 13 is lucky.

I hope 2013 will be the year of luck for my family and I.

2013……….the year we are healthy

2013……….the year of happiness

2013……….the year we never forget

2013……….the year we are all stronger

2013……….the year we will spend more time together

2013……….the year of new beginnings

Happy New Year!

My New Year’s Resolution this year is to spend more time with family and get back into doing the things I love!

Yours??????


some say luck, fate, I say “thank you”

As I left you off last post, I said I didn’t make it to the hot tub that day………………. I am going to tell you what happened that day…………………..

You know the saying “second chance?” I had my second chance with my Mitral Valve repair in 2004. My title “some say luck, fate, I say “thank you”, well I say “thank you” because that day I got a “third” chance at life.

January 24,2012.

I remember running on the treadmill in the fitness area, at the Rec Centre and while I was running there was an elderly couple that came to exercise beside me on a couple of stationary bikes. I remember because I apologized for the heavy running noise, the elderly woman laughed and said to me not to worry, and made a joke saying that they were part deaf anyways. I laughed, still ran on. I noticed that there was a gentleman working out with the weights diagonal from me, and I still ran on. I looked down to see where K was with the boys because the fitness area was above the pool so that you could look down and watch. I noticed a gentleman in the pool that I thought was K but it wasn’t. I panicked looking around for K and noticed that he was walking with the boys. I thought to myself “uh oh they are going to the hot tub already without me” and I wanted to finish my run. I looked at the clock, wanting to know what time it was and it said about 2:38? So I still ran, knowing that I only had about 6 or 9 mins left in my run. Then I looked to my left and noticed a blonde girl coming to run on the treadmill beside me, next thing I remember was looking forward and my vision went like when a television loses connection and it goes snowy, well it did, then it was black…………

The next thing I remember was someone saying my name over and over which I later found out it was K. A few moments later I hear a gentleman saying my name and asking me if I knew where I was. I mumbled the place, and he said that I had to keep the oxygen mask on, because I remember fighting it with them trying to put it on my face and then I hear sirens. While I was in the ambulance, K was on the phone to hubby DC, telling him that I had collapsed and was on my way to the hospital. DC was in the grocery store when he got the news and he was so shocked that he dropped everything and left to go tell our children that their mom was on her way to the hospital. DC didn’t know what to do, whether to just drop everything and get to me or wait to find out what was wrong with me first, because he was three provinces away. K also had called M to let her know what had happened, and that he was coming to get her. A lifeguard ended up watching the boys,and there were a couple of friends of K at the pool too that knew the boys and took over. Which was a relief to K since he needed to rush to the hospital as quickly as possible.

I arrived to the hospital and I remember a woman saying to me it’s alright, you’re alright and you’re going to feel a warm sensation, don’t worry you didn’t pee yourself. I was having a CT Scan done to check if there was any brain damage, and a X-ray to check for any broken ribs. I didn’t have any damage to either brain or ribs. The whole time I was in and out of consciousness I didn’t have my eyes open. I then remember hearing K talking to someone about my information, my name, where I lived etc. Then suddenly it was like someone turned on a light switch and I could open my eyes! I looked over and saw K standing beside me and he says to the nurse” could you pass me her glasses? she’s pretty blind with out them” and he gives them to me. I put them on and looked over to K saying “What happened?” “What happened?”. K came over to me, cried, hugged me and said “you collapsed”. I was really shocked at this moment because I only remember running on the treadmill and now here I am in the hospital???

I asked K what had happened over and over, it was probably more than 5 times within an hour or more and K was getting worried, looked over at the nurse and she said it was normal for people to have a little amnesia. K explained as much as he could about what had happened…….

K said when I collapsed, the elderly couple noticed that I had fallen in between the treadmills and was unconscious, so the elderly woman rushed to get help. A lifeguard came and started CPR, while the lifeguard was doing CPR there was another one getting the AED kit. The lifeguard with the AED kit came opened it up and it had said that it was needed. My heart had stopped. They put the AED on me used it. It brought me back. All of this happened less than 2 minutes. Another lifeguard had called 911 and the ambulance was on their way. Ambulance came. Ambulance took me to the hospital.

So, you can call it luck, fate for that day but…..

I say “thank you” because those lifeguards saved my life and gave my third chance.


the beginning

As I sit in front of my laptop to type out what was one of my most difficult days of my life……January 24,2012. From the beginning, I had told you before that I have become to love running, and after my half marathon back in Oct, I hadn’t run for almost 3 months. I was busy working and being lazy at the same time, so I decided to get back into running right after New Years. I was feeling right back where I had started when I started running, which I was thinking that I shouldn’t have stopped in the first place but at least I was starting back up again. I only ran 2 times before that day, January 5th and 10th, because I offered to help out my brother K and sister-in-law M.

M had gotten a new job, and they needed a sitter for a short while until they found a daycare or day home to watch their two boys. Plus I got a phone call from M that K had to go to the hospital, January 7th, because he couldn’t walk on his left leg. We found out that K had a DVT (blood clot) which worried me because he is only 35 yrs old. I was so glad that I was flying out to help out on the 10th since K wasn’t to work for a few days and try to get this blood clot to thin.

I flew to British Columbia where K & M live and everything was going great. I was helping out with the boys, who I adore, helping M around the house while she was at her new job and driving too since M doesn’t drive. K took me around “touring” which I must say no wonder they call it “Beautiful British Columbia” its beautiful! with all the mountains, orchards, lakes and there is just so much to see and do!

On January 24,2012, K was off that day and we decided to take the boys to a program called “Strong Start” where kids can go meet other kids, do arts and crafts etc. So we took the boys to Strong Start and we had a great morning. It was “gym” day and the boys got to use the gym equipment like the basketballs, hoola hoops, floor mats and scooters that you sit on and roll around the gym. K even had both boys on the scooters holding hoola hoops, and rolling them around, swinging them, they were having a blast! I had fun watching them laugh and smile too. After Strong Start we headed for home and had lunch, put the boys down for their short afternoon nap.

When the boys woke from their nap and we got them ready for the Rec Centre for a swim, I decided that I was going to get a run instead because I hadn’t done any running since the 10th.  I went up to the Fitness Centre which looked over the swimming pool so I could run and watch K swim with the boys. I decided to run 30 mins on the treadmill and when finished, I was going to meet K and the boys in the hot tub.

However, I didn’t make it down to the hot tub that day…………………………………………


half marathon here I come??

So the last post I said that my brother K said to run a half marathon with him and I said I laughed……… well I did at first then I thought about it. I thought “why not”? Why not do a half marathon? What’s another extra 16.1 km? I only had run up to 5 km but what’s another 16.1 km?? Haha yea I told K that I would think about it, and while I was thinking about it, I started to run to see if I could do it. Well I ran 7 km and thought yea I could totally do this! haha not thinking that there were more km to go.

I ran 7 km for the first part of the month of June, which later I learned that I shouldn’t have done that since I had at the end of my training I was squeezing in my longer runs and it was tough! Anyways, I did do my training and I felt so good! I was getting “addicted” to running! On August 7 th, 2011, I officially registered for the BMO Okanagan Marathon 21.1 km run, I had to register or I wasn’t going to go thru with it.

I flew from Manitoba to British Columbia on Oct 6 th and the run was on the 9th. I was so nervous to run this marathon too but once I got there, saw all the people running for the cause, I calmed down and was very excited! My goal was to try to run the marathon under 2 hr and 45 mins, my chip time ended up being 2 hr 46 mins and I was okay with that! I was just so glad that I had done it and with my brother K too.


the change

From the last post I had said that we had a change in 2007, the change started actually in 2006 when my hubby decided he needed a career change and it was something that he has always wanted to do, but because of marriage, kids etc he wasn’t able to do this career change until June 2006.

DC (hubby) had wanted to apply for the government, he did all the testing that was required and passed with flying colors. He got the official word that he would be hired, which wasn’t until Feb 19,2007! Yes I know what you’re thinking, that was a long process, and yes it was! Anyways, when he got the official date that he would be hired, he had to go for training. When finished he would have to move from Alberta to Manitoba where he would work.

Needless to say , we weren’t all that happy to move two provinces away. Since we had lived in Alberta for just about 17 yrs! The kids (which we have 2 girls and a boy, C 15 yrs, D 12 yrs and E 7 yrs) had been born where we were , went to school since Kindergarten, had lots of family and friends. Where as we didn’t have any friends or family in Manitoba. It was a hard difficult decision but we all understood that DC wanted to do this since he graduated high school.  We had moved to a rural town in south-western Manitoba of August 2007, we still live in Manitoba, and it’s been almost 5 yrs, it has gone quicker than I imagined! The kids had surprisingly settled in quite nicely, made new friends and didn’t mind living here after all!

DC & I  have made lots of friends here and love them all but it’s not like having family, which we are now trying to have a transfer to be near family due to my episode that happened to me this past January. We are hoping that the government will allow us to move and make it easier for us than doing other options.

Like I said before in the last post, I have lived with MVP (Mitral Valve Prolapse) for so many years and had surgery, went back to my regular routine again. So when we moved to Manitoba, I still continued to see my Cardiologist back in Alberta since I had seen him for so long that there was no reason for me to switch to another Cardiologist because it was only once a year, and Manitoba Health was going to allow me to see him once a year. Again every year that we have been here in Manitoba, the same routine by my Cardiologist. When I had my surgery in 2004, I felt that I was over weight and decided to join Curves, to help me be at a healthy weight. My starting weight was 158 lbs, when I had my surgery I ended up being at 149 lbs. I had lost almost 10 lbs by surgery, I couldn’t believe it! I didn’t want my weight to start with just dropping almost 10 lbs , which I felt was unhealthy! So I went to Curves and did all the exercises and watched my calories etc. I went to Curves for almost 3 yrs and maintained my weight at 147 lbs and just stayed there! The Cardiologist told me that a healthy weight for me was around 135 lbs and not to go dramatically up or down due to my heart condition.

I found out that we had a Curves here, where we live but they had inconvenient times, so I stopped going. I decided to go to the gym instead, I even got a local “personal trainer” to help me with all the equipment and how to use them properly so I wouldn’t hurt myself. I did that for a year, I didn’t see any progress at all! My weight stayed the same, I had only lost one inch! one inch around every part of my body and I have to admit, I was very frustrated! I decided to stop going to the gym. Until a very close friend of mine decided she was needing a change herself and started using Jillian Michael’s DVD called the 30 Day Shred. She asked me if I would be interested in working out with her three days a week.

I did take her offer because I thought to myself “why not’? I wanted to keep fit and be healthy so I joined her. We did it together for almost two yrs, three days a week! I saw so much results and so did she! We had a great time doing this together, which was nice because it got us to know each other since we both had things in common. With just using the 30 Day Shred, I had lost so many inches and weight which I was sitting at 142 lbs at the first 6 months of starting the shred. At the end of our two yrs of using the shred I ended up being 135 lbs, which was my goal! I was so happy and impressed that I did it!

While I was doing all this exercise, I was feeling great! I didn’t feel tired, didn’t have hardly any migraines, loved it! My Cardiologist was happy that I was keeping my self healthy and exercising and knowing my limits.

So 2010, my Brother K, and sister-in-law M, had started running, they both signed up for runs. K for his very first run ( which I couldn’t believe) he signed up for a half marathon, M signed up for a 5 k. They both were training for their runs and did the run Oct 2010, which I was so proud of them both that they had inspired me.

January 2011, I had decided my New Year’s Resolution, and to go through with it (this time lol) was going to run a 5 k for the very first time…………